Circa 1876

“It’s Independence Day”

The Fourth of July festivities were just gettin underway when Miss Kitty headed down the stairs of the Long Branch. Her contribution to the day’s events was a kissing booth…….She was getting so desperate for affection that this was the only way she reckoned she would get any. For 50¢

a gentleman could give her a peck on the cheek. For 75¢ he could kiss her right on the lips. God KNOWS what she would do for $ 1 !

She sat in the booth awaiting her first customer. She hoped and prayed that the young bucks in town would form a queue.

As she sat there daydreaming of a great smooch, up walked Clem Kadiddlehopper: http://www.idoodit.com/ClemTV1951.JPG

Kitty muttered to herself…….”When the stork brought you, Clem, he should’ve been shot on sight!”

Clem:”Hello, (3) Pretty Woman. Here’s my money. Pucker up, Miss Kitty.” She closed her eyes and prayed for rain!!

Her next customer came to her booth…..”(2) It’s over, maam. You can open your eyes, now. Kitty almost fell over backwards when she saw who was next…..Johnny Dipstick:

http://www.funmunch.com/celebrities/actors/johnny_depp/enlarge/johnny_depp_3.jpg

Kitty:”Well, helloooooooooooooooooooo, gorgeous.”

Johnny:” Do you have change for a five?”

Kitty:”Keep your money, sweetie. This one’s on the house!”

Kitty was having a great time until she saw Matt and Sunshine strolling happily down Front street, hand in hand…….. “Oh, Matt…..(6) All I can do is dream you. (4) Only the lonely could possibly know how I feel.”

Further on down the road, there was a pie eating contest.

Little Opie Trailer was on his third pie with no end in sight!!

He had Festus Haggen,the odds on favorite to take home the blue ribbon, (1) Running scared.

On the outskirts of town there was to be a shooting contest. U.S.Marshal Matt Dillon’s girlfriend,Sunshine MacGillicutty: http://gertieland.com/nuriaperis/imatges/cg2/cowgirl.jpg

was pitted against none other than, Dead Eye Delores:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/mod_complex/272271505/

As the contest got underway, they were matching each other, target for target.

Finally, the tie was broken when Dead Eye Delores happened to see her boyfriend fondling Miss Kitty in the Kissing Booth !! She missed the target completely and wounded one of the people in the crowd!

When the contest was over and Sunshine was proudly wearing her blue ribbon, they stopped to watch the parade. Everyone seemed to be enjoying the clowns….Everyone but little Debby Bernard. Sunshine watched as Debbie broke out into a panic. Sunshine nudged Matt. They knew that Debby had an abusive father. Matt had warned him that if he EVER hit his daughter or wife again, he wouln’t just go to jail. This time he would go to the State Pen in Topeka. Matt stooped down and saw the bruise on her face. She was (5)crying.Sunshine held her in her arms. She pinned her blue ribbon on on Debby’s shirt. It seemed to please her. Matt gently asked her if her father had done that. Debby nodded and told him that her mother had also been hit.

Matt:”That’s it !! He walked toward their small house on the outskirts of town. Then he stopped. He smelled smoke:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYENO6r5vVo

It’s over!! I’ve decided to give up any chance of having fun, here on Y!A. I reported someone, for scaring some women. And he sent me a personal Threat. So I’m leaving.

…Now, he’s running scared from the Law. Because they’re after him! And I don’t wanna see you crying, either. It was fun, once. But the fun went out. When the Kids got out. And it’s only the lonely have to be here. All I can do is dream of you. And wish you all of the happiness that your Heart can find!