A long time ago, there was a happy family in one of the remote villages. Among them, was the eldest son who recently graduated from college and joined the police force. The first year on the force he received only one star. A couple of years later he got promoted as lieutenant and received two stars, and another couple of years later he became the captain and received three stars. So, during the rank of captain he went to the village to see his parents. The parents were very glad to see him full of stars on both shoulders. Another couple of years later he was promoted to major, and left to see his parents again. During these days the parents thought that he got demoted rather than promoted, because they thought he should have been wearing four stars rather than one.

A long time ago, there was a happy family living in a remote village. The eldest son graduated from College and became a police officer. When he first joined he received only 1 star. A couple of years later he got a promotion to lieutenant with 2 stars, and another few years later he became the captain with 3 stars. When he reached the rank of captain he went to the village to see his parents. His parents were very glad to see him full of stars on both shoulders. Another few years passed and he was promoted to major and left to see his parents again. During these days his parents thought that he got a demotion rather than a promotion, because he should receive 4 stars rather than 1(..).

Although not too perfect, try to learn from this passage and improve your English.

A long time ago, there lived a happy family in a remote village. Among them the eldest son had graduated from college, and joined the police force. He received only one star for the first time there. A couple of years later he was promoted to lieutenant with two stars and three stars a few years later as an captain. Furthermore, as an captian he went into the village to see his parents and they were glad to see all his star on his shoulders. However, another couple of years past and he became an major and left to see his parents again. But, during this time his parents thought he got demoted rather then promoted, because it was thought he would receive four stars rather then one.

A long time ago, there was a happy family in a remote village. The eldest son of the family had graduated from college and become a police officer. For his first promotion he received only one star. A couple of years later he was promoted again, to Lieutenant, and got two stars, and a few years after that, he became a Captain with three stars. After he became a Captain, he went back to the village to see his parents. The parents were very glad to see him with full stars on both shoulders. After a few more years he became a Major and visited his parents again. After seeing him, his parents thought that he had been demoted rather than promoted, because they thought that he should have received four stars rather than one.

Note: I’m an English Major in College. I edited for sentence fluency as well.

A long time ago, there was a happy family in a remote village. Amongst them, the eldest son graduated from College and joined the Police Force. For the first time he received a star. A couple of years later he got a promotion as a Lieutenant with 2 stars, another couple of years later he became the Captain with 3 stars.

So, during the rank of Captain he went to the village to see his parents. The parents were very glad to see him, full of stars on both shoulders. After another couple of years he became the Major and left to see his parents again. During these days his parents thought that he got demoted rather than promoted, because they thought he should have received 4 stars rather than one.

A long time ago there was a happy family in a remote village. After he had graduated from college, the eldest son joined the police, intially as a constable with a single star. He was later promoted to a lieutenant with two stars. Within a couple of years he became a three star captain and returned to his home village to see his parents. They were very glad to see him with stars on both shoulders. Some years later he became a major and on his return to his parents’ village they were disappointed to see he now had only one star, rather than the four they had expected.

Where have you learnt English? please let us now how and where you were taught.

When I was studying English (admittedly many years ago) the word “got” was to be avoided at all costs – there are many alternatives.