if he does 10 minutes of work reward him with 5 minutes of games or something

Are you sure he is ready? My nephew was a very advanced child in pre-k he could already read on a second grade level. But emotionally he was not ready. This resulted in many tantrums and bad behavior. When the teachers told my sister he was emotionally not ready. She pulled him out. Waited until he was five almost six and put him into kindergarten where he excelled. In first grade he was reading on a fifth grade level. It is not only the brains that must grow it is the emotions also.

I think kids are forced to grow up too quick. Let him be a four year old and watch his cartoons (within reason) like most four year olds do.

On the other side a four year old’s class probably does not send homework home. Most work will be done in class where there is no tv and all of his peers will be doing the same thing he is.

Get him ready by psyching him up, start a get up routine, mention school a lot with extra enthusiasm. That will help more than burning him out with work, before he actually has to work.

Hi,

I think “Angiem” and “momof3” have the best slant on this situation.

Getting him excited about attending the pre-K class is so much more important than having him practice what he apparently already knows how to do.

Although screaming and throwing tantrums is not an acceptable behavior, at 4 he may not be able to properly articulate his frustration with your request that he sit and do school work.

Please don’t walk away and ignore him, as others have advised. Try to calm him down and help him explain to you why he is so upset. He may not be able to tell you, but with a little time and a LOT of patience, the two of you can come up with the answer.

This is a prime age for connecting with your son, allow him to understand that he is entitled to feelings of anger and frustration, and you want to help him with those feelings but he needs to learn to express them to you so you are able to help.

Let him be a child. Childhood is the only thing in life that is truly limited.

Finger paints, writing in the sand (a tray in the house on a rainy day filled with salt works too), make a family tree with construction paper, writing everyone’s name on a leaf, etc…

Do the fun things that he won’t think of as “work”.

You sound like you ARE a good parent. As long as he knows you love him and will be there for him, whatever life deals him, he’ll be ready to take on the world.

Good Luck and Have Fun!!

Leave the child ALONE about this stuff. Clearly you and he are not meant for you to be teaching him now. For whatever reason, this has become a power struggle and you are both losing.

He may be perfectly happy and “work” at school. A good pre-K teacher will make it all seem like fun and play, even as the kids do amazing things. This is not the age for struggle and serious-minded endeavor.

Limit TV time and spend more time outside, just running around or observing ants or pouring water from one container to another. Inside read to him, use books (New Book of Knowledge encyclopedia is great) to show him pictures of things that interest/frighten him and read a little about them. A tornado came close to us when my son was 3; for weeks I’d get out the T volume to show him that the sky in the tornado picture didn’t look like the sky outside our window so he’d feel safe to go out. Let him build, draw, color, arrange things.

“Smart” isn’t in the medium–words and numbers and pencils. It’s in the activities and the questions you ask, the questions he asks, and the answers you two give.

Do not force the work on him While in the car play games in counting and spelling his name ect.

Get CD’s and turn off the TV stuff

Instead of TV take him outside and share the world with him

Let him see you read a book or paper

Count outloud the plates on the table soon he will want more and work at school more.

He was put in the class because he knew the work make sure he is also ready for the social part of the moving up He knows the work, is he nervous about the social part?

the others have all given very good advice, my additional two cents worth..

what you are teaching him by giving in to the tantrums is that he will get his way if he acts up. he obviously is very intelligent, and has learned manipulation. let him have his tantrums, and when he is ready to calm down a bit, have some new, exciting, challenging lessons awaiting him. even though he is very intelligent, his attention span may still be that of a 4 year old, so, do not make the lessons long. there are also probably lessons on DVDs that could work as the lesson and the TV. but, he needs to learn that screaming and kicking are not the answer.

congratulations, good luck

Seriously, 4 is very young. If he can do the things that you say he can, then great! He does not need to know them yet- but it really is great that he does.

I would not make him sit down and do any kind of drill and practice or writing unless he wants to. Play games with him (there are great card games and great educational games out there.) Pencil and paper work might not be something he loves now- and if you put pressure on him to so he will HATE it ! At his young age you do not want him to get turned off to “school work.” He will be in schools for years and years and and turning him away now will have severe negative outcomes.

There is a time and place for everything. Allow him to watch a little TV each day but the rest of the day encourage activities that your family supports… Let him be a kid and encourage a love of learning…read to him, play with him and keep him moving! You sound like you are a devoted parent- enjoy his precious youth- it does not last long.

I’d congratulate your son for having a good understanding of what is appropriate. Four year olds should not have to do homework. They time they spend in school requires a tremendous amount of self control and focus. They just cannot sustain it when they are at home. Give him lots of down time, provide him with lots of toys and books and limit TV watching but do not eliminate it completely,and find a preschool that emphasis learning through play and makes learning interesting and exciting. Too much emphasis on formal academics this young may well destroy your son’s natural curiosity and eagerness to learn and turn him off school permanently.

This is the problem with early education. He might be advanced academically, however he is still only four. At this age the ‘work’ should be more like play. There are many things that can be taught through play. Any teacher that is working with a bright pre-schooler should know how to handle this. If they don’t they are teaching the wrong age and type of child.

My oldest was also very smart at a young age. He could write his name along with the entire alphabet and numbers. He could add at 3 years old. He loved to sit with me and draw write and read so I put him in an advanced pre-k class where they sat at a desk and did school work. He learned alot in this class including how to read but he also developed a hate towards learning because he wasn’t ready for this kind of learning. Try teaching him in fun ways. He is still young and will love to learn if it is fun. Don’t push him into it or punish him for not doing book work. You are obviously a good parent or he would not already know how to write his name or know his numbers. Why not let him write with chalk in the driveway or finger paint his numbers on the shower wall. Don’t push him to grow up too fast… they do that on their own!!

Wow, I don’t think I’ve ever heard of anything more developmentally INappropriate. He is four years old. Four year olds should not be expected to sit still for that long.

You are not being a good parents by forcing your young child to do things that he is not developmentally ready to do, if anything you are hurting him in the long run. If you keep working with him like this he could grow up to be depressed or hating school work. He’ll be burnt out before he finishes elementary school.