It is a little repetitive. try coming up with other ways to say the same thing just use different words.

Since I was a little girl, I have always wanted to be a doctor, now that I am older I know it is my true passion to become one. Helping others to feel truly comfortable, serving others, laughing, crying, and sharing in the lives of my patientsis what I want to do with my life.

What do you think?

Now that I am older i< see my true passion on< being a doctor I love to help others and make them feel truly comfortable. truly? I want to be a doctor so i< can serve others serve others? thats is the police, Do you want to be, or would you like to be? I would like to be a doctor to help others. You never once talked about healing the sick, or treating people's illness, finding a cure. Honestly. Scrap what you have and start over. Start with this An ever growing passion of mine would be to become a doctor; it has been my dream since I was a little girl. I would like to be a doctor to help others. I have an over whelming compassion to help others in their time of need. I have learned this compassion not only from my family life but from the lives I have shared as a personal care attendant. Dont copy what I have wrote, everyones writing style is diffrent and it will show in your work. And above all, do no harm.