Does this sentence sound okay?

Should I fix this sentence or keep it the way it is?

“By the third time, I just kept my eyes shut tight as I continued to clutch the handle when the elevator would ascend just to make its free-fall down the shaft.”

Top 3 Answers

A few days ago

Anonymous

Favorite Answer

Fix it

A few days ago

mac3

I would change the sentence.

By the third time, I kept my eyes closed tightly. I clutched the handle as the elevator began its descent into a free-fall down the shaft of darkness and uncertainty.

A few days ago

mister_anonymous1970

how does this sound?

“By the third time, I shut my eyes tightly; I clutched the handle inside the elevator as it started to make its free-fall down the shaft.”

ascended means to go up.

your sentence is a little wordy..

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Does this sentence sound okay?

Does this sentence sound okay?

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