A few days ago

MrsBaker

I need help re-wording a sentence for my grad school personal statement…?

The sentence is:

I think that the word “sheltered” is a grave understatement for what my parents did to me.

I want to replace the “did to me” with some thing less judgemental

I thought about putting “how they raised me” but that doesn’t sound as bold

Any suggestions?

Top 7 Answers

A few days ago

nicolemcg

Favorite Answer

When it comes to how I was raised, “sheltered” is a grave understatement.

To say that our parents raised us is a sheltered environment is a grave understatement.

Best.

A few days ago

magen s

I think that the word “sheltered” is a grave understatement considering my upbringing.

I think that the word “sheltered” is a grave understatement considering my parent’s parenting philosophy.

I think that the word “sheltered” is a grave understatement considering how I was raised.

A few days ago

Durga sings the classics

To say I grew up in a “sheltered environment” would be a grave understatement.

“Sheltered” doesn’t begin to explain my upbringing.

A few days ago

sdajc0603

I actually think “how they raised me” sounds a lot better, because the beginning portion of your sentience is bold enough. Your original sentence makes it seem as though your blaming your parents and that may make you seem irresponsible.

A few days ago

Den

Toss the sentence,it sounds accusational.

Try this;

My parents raised me in a way that sequestered me from the hurtful things in life.I do feel that they over-protected me and I am naive because of it.I am learning it as I go along,in an impromtu way.

A few days ago

Tatsbabe

If you really wanted to keep the boldness of your original statement, you could change ‘did to me’ to ‘did for me’. Otherwise I agree with the person above.

4 years ago

purely drop the final section altogether. truthful empathy and compassion already advise which you have a force to help human beings. in case you state which you have a force to help human beings, the rest is purely redundant.

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I need help re-wording a sentence for my grad school personal statement…?

I need help re-wording a sentence for my grad school personal statement…?

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