I am doing pretty well in my work. The problem is that I am extremely miserble… I typically

alternate between nervousness and depression.I get nervous about uncertain future etc. And then

depression kicks in: I ask myself, why worry about the future, would a postman’s job

not bring me better pay, more rights and a higher standard of living? I am totally lost

about how I stand in society and see myself as a slave, who at 23, cannot even use a masters

degree to earn above min wage. I have never had a driver’s license, still live with

a roommate and the money I make is awful. Life seems to be an unending wait for death

and I want to be sedated, or put out of my misery… I want to slit my throat, but

my courage fails me at that moment.