If a mother stays at home with her child and is very involved with interacting with that child – reading with them, providing quality toys, arranging beneficial playdates, going to the park/zoo/whatever, monitoring that child’s diet and sleep patterns, and making sure their health is well taken care of – chances are, that child will develop well. On the other hand, if that same mother turns her child over to the TV, lets them run wild, feeds them nothing but convenience food, and does not institute good sleep patterns, chances are that child will not develop well.

If a child is in a quality preschool or daycare with a quality program, and their parents are conscientious of the rest of that child’s welfare, the child will most likely show better development. If the child is put in a daycare where the children sit on the dirty floor and cry all day, throwing things at each other and eating the toys, and if the parents are just plain too tired at the end of the day to interact with their children…well, the results probably won’t be as good.

It’s just not a black and white question – there are so many other factors that figure into it.

Signs of a Good Preschool – http://education.preschoolrock.com/index.php/preschool_information_for_parents/signs_of_a_good_preschool

Someone said that SAHM can afford to do so because they are financially affluent. Yes, they have to be extremely financially affluent or must sacrifice a certain quality of life.

Personally, I hold a bachelor’s degree and my husband has a master’s. We are both educators. We make a pretty good living as professionals. We have two kids and we own a house (well, we will in about 27 years!). We have two cars, one is paid for and the other is leased. But we have student loan debt, and we have credit card debt from the years that we had to make it on one income or no income due to college (we could not both afford to go at the same time). I HAVE to work for us to even be able to eat and pay off our debt. We would continue to go deeper into debt if only one of us worked while the other stayed home with the kids. Sure, maybe the solution is to wait and have kids. Well, let me tell you. I waited until 28 years of age. Much later, and I would not be able to have the number of children we wanted safely. Risks to babies increase as mom’s age increases. It’s a choice we made, and let me tell you, we thought about it extensively – serious planned parenthood. Not like all the people out there who just get pregnant willy nilly. And trust me, I am a FANTASTIC parent. I may not spend every living moment with my children playing with them, teaching them, just like I’m sure SAHM’s do (yeah, right!). But I spend serious quality time with my kids when I am with them. And I am constantly teaching them – everything I can, not just school stuff, but life stuff, too. And my kids are smart. My 4 year old can explain things that some adults can’t even figure out. And his childcare providers all along have always commented on how he knew everything they were going to teach him – because I teach him at home! I am my child’s first parent.

So in conclusion, you might say that I agree with your question. Yes, in my experience, my children have benefited greatly from preschool as opposed to my staying at home to raise them. Without my job (which means I have to send my kids to preschool), we would either not be able to afford food for our family to eat or we would not have children at all. Kids can’t develop without food, and they can’t develop if they’re never born.

It depends on what you do at home while you’re with them that makes the difference and I’m not talking a full education program. Playing with them, teaching them colors, shapes, letting them use their imagination, encouraging them to think and come up with ideas is what makes the difference.

Oh and I stayed home but no I was not affluent just

felt my child was more important than the money so we did without until he was older.

http://homeparents.about.com/cs/stayathomemoms/a/nanny.htm

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/77690/stayathome_moms_vs_working_moms.html

http://www.journaltimes.com/nucleus/index.php?itemid=5192