A few days ago
Hank Wu

Dear English writers….Please help me improve my writing and expression in English?

Dear English teachers, I am trying to write a business letter (for my homework) to drive my dealers to make more sales. It needs to be aggressive and powerful ..please help me correct my paragraph and make my expression more persuasive. Thanks

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To whom it may concern:

To recap the conversation we had on the phone, we need

you to confirm the earliest date to open L/C to us

by next Monday. Without your L/C, we can not proceed your order to production line.

At current stage, HotFort is looking for the sales performance from your side now. Please show your determination on sales performance to us. Definitely, the machinery exhibition held

on April 17- April 21 in 2008 is very important to both of us. This is why we need you to confirm your order and L/C in order to meet this exhibition. Hot_Fort sales representative will attend the exhibition next April in order to show our cooperation and determination to this business.

best regard

Top 2 Answers
A few days ago
angie p

Favorite Answer

I hope this helps!

To whom it may concern:

In line with the conversation we had on the phone recently, may we request you to open an L/C on or before Monday so that we can promptly submit your orders to the production line. Any delay in its submission may result in non-delivery of your orders and, consequently, loss in potential commissions for you.

At present, HotFort is strengthening its foothold and positioning itself to become No. 1 in the industry. To reach this goal, we are counting on you and your all-important sales performance this month. The machinery exhibition, to be held

on April 17-April 21, 2008, is extremely crucial as it would give us that one-in-a-million chance to showcase our company’s excellence. When you are part of the top company in the industry, clients would invariably look up to you and approach you for your services. This is why we need you to confirm your order and L/C before the deadline in order to meet this exhibition and make it the most successful one we will have to date.

We trust that you could stand up to this challenge and make this year and the next the best ever for HotFort!

Best regards,

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A few days ago
jazz_devotee
As Steve Martin once said, “Some people have a way with the English language and others…oh, I don’t know…..not have way.”
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