hi aunty, thanks for connecting with me. you can become a good wife by:

1. by being who you are. let your husband know what you feel and what you think

2. be honest in every way

3. prolong your patience

4. love the positive traits of your husband and embrace the negatives

Congratulations, Aunty!!! I was a little surprised by the question about whether it was fair to go on a world tour and leave your children only a small house, but I see that you are talking about beliefs and values about the future!!! That is a great idea! Actually, I should have said “Best Wishes!” One congratulates the groom. I am very happy for you.

My husband and I have been married more than 35 years. When we were engaged, I found some books in a Christian bookstore written by a minister to his own son and daughter. I believe his name was Charlie Shedd. I know that the one to his daughter was called “Letters to Karen.” I sent the one to the son to my husband, who was then my fiance. Ray, my husband, still quotes it to those about to be married. One sentence made a lasting impression on him. It said, “Always praise in public, and if necessary, criticize in private.”

I would not rush out and get those books because they were about relationships in the 70s. What I would say to you is that you need to be the kind of friend to each other that you believe an ideal best friend would be. Do not expect perfection from each other; you did not expect your close friends to be perfect. Your mate is a human being too. Learn the art of mutual compromise. There will be zillions of times in your married life when you do not like the same couch, do want to go the same place on vacation, agree about whose parents to spend a particular holiday with, etc. The important thing is that you have a way to arrive at an answer that brings harmony.

Do not forget to tell each other that you love each other and to show it in many ways. I think many people must get so caught up in the “busy-ness” of life that they forget to tell the person they love most things like, “I was looking forward to seeing you again all day long!” Newlyweds probably have that one down pat, but I am thinking of advice for further down the road.

If you choose to have children, do not forget that important as the family is, your relationship as a couple is important too. Make it a point to carve out some time just for the two of you once in a while.

Finally, Aunty, whatever “issues” we have as children or young adults, we bring into a marriage with us. If either of you should find down the line that your own or the mate’s issues are causing a problem, it is worth seeking professional help. Sometimes even a couple of joint therapy sessions may be all it takes to shed some light on the problem.

And here is the most wonderful news: Someone entering marriage questioning, “What can I do to be a wonderful spouse?” will, in fact, be one. I wish you nothing but the absolute BEST!!!!! And I hope that your chosen husband is asking himself the same kinds of questions; if he is, thirty-five years from now you will be telling each other that you cannot believe your good fortune in finding each other.

Best wishes and congratulations!!!

Hey Aunty. That isn’t an easy question to answer. You have to really define what being a good wife means to you. Some women define it as losing their individuality and becoming one with their spouse. Others define it as being able to love and share the same space with someone and still be and individual that can be devoted to a relationship. It can be very complicated indeed. If we could figure it out, there would not be so many divorces of record. I would suggest talking to your finance`. Discuss what he expects from a wife, how he expects she act within the relationship, and what he expects your role to be. If his ideas are not in tune with the way you want to live your life, you will never be a good wife. Being a good wife depends on not only you but him as well. Good luck and I hope you make the right choice. Too many people don’t realize the seriousness of marriage and end up divorcing. I hope this is not you 😉

Stop worrying about it; life has a way of evening things out.

Hopefully, the man you will marry is more worried about how he can be a good husband and work with you 50/50 to make the marriage successful.

Never forget this: Words matter. Words can hurt so bad that the pain never goes out of the memory.

Never go to bed angry. Best advice I ever received. Always say I love you, at least once a day. Second best advice.

To this day My son tells his wife, I love you so much, every day of his life. She beams when he says it, and always says I love you when they part or wake in the morning.

Well being a good human being is more important as u’ll be going to a new home in a new environment if u have ur husbands folks u’d have to connect with them, usually a good wife is a women who doesn’t argue , knows when to keep her mouth shut and knows how to cook and clean, is exceptional in bed and ready to give the hubby a good bonur ( lol put e in place of u) lol that counts too lol now if u think ur cut for all these things then bingo ur a good wife already….Ah mom-in-law she must be really really be pleased lol.

But wat u think is making ur husband think if he’ll be a good husband.

Get to know your kids interests, and if its baseball take them to a game, play catch in the back yard. Try to enjoy their interests with them and show them the ropes on some of your own, lets say you like NASCAR teach them how the cars are designed to go faster. With your husband. Find out what you can do around the house to keep her stress level lower, maybe he just would like help with the dishes or help folding laundry, they arnt chores if you find time to do it together and have a good time joking around in the process. Let her know she can vent to you about her day, and when she has a problem ask her if there is anything you can do to help fix it. if she says no then just take it as she just needed to let off some steam and talk to someone about it. But just cause your asking this makes me think your a good husband and a good mom because you care enough to try to be better 🙂

I like Mikeg’s answer.

Also be yourself as well. He’s marrying you for who he knows and loves now so don’t change that part.

Keep an open line of communication. It’s the most important part of a marriage. All the rest will fall in place.

Best wishes.

Well, a few pieces of advice:

Make sure you turn the baby properly if you believe it’s going to be breech.

An infusion of wormwood and brandy does wonders for the nerves of a concerned husband.

Contrary to popular belief, red-haired infants are not the spawn of Satan.

Also, blood draining and leeches never helped anybody… wait, you said goodwife?

Be like the October birthstone, an opal; iridescent, smooth, all “colors” and soft (for a gemstone!).

Be patient, respectful, polite, helpful.

Make an effort to learn things that will help you and them, such as cooking (even just a little), cleaning, etc.