A few days ago
รզlεսռց ☆

Does this sentence make sense?

“Likewise, Unleashed also displays signs of compassion in the same proportional state as Slaughterboy.”

Can I use the words “same proportional state” in my above sentence? If not, any suggestions on what else I could use? It sounds alright but I just want to make sure.

It’s for an English essay and any answers would be kindly appreciated.

Top 4 Answers
A few days ago
xanjo

Favorite Answer

“Same proportional state” is incorrect.

You could try;

Similarly, Unleashed also displays signs of compassion in the same proportions as Slaughterboy.

or

Unleashed and Slaughterboy share common characteristics, with similar levels of compassion.

0

A few days ago
l_franks03
This might not help at all, but if you feel that your sentence sounds awkward, try completely rewording it. I often get stuck trying to make a sentence I wrote sound good, but in the end I find it best to start from scratch. You could try something like, “In addition, Unleashed and Slaughterboy depict similar signs of compassion.” Good luck!
0

A few days ago
Anonymous
The sentence sounds acceptable but I’d be likely to use ‘to the same extent’ or ‘to the same degree’ in preference to ‘in the same proportional state’. Your latter phrase sounds more appropriate to a mathematical description.
1

A few days ago
jingles
It sounds okay, but I would just say “in the same proportion as.” That sounds better to me and a little less complicated.
0