A few days ago
Anonymous

Do you think this English sentence below is correct? Does it make sense?

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Integrating the authority is a very important thing to do in order to deliver efficient licensing services as well as to hamper corruption. Therefore, we can use this technology for: – Government Procurement. It seems that we need to set the time target in relation with this new project, starting from the program proposal, internal and external discussion and preparation of the scope of work.

Top 5 Answers
A few days ago
Goddess of Grammar

Favorite Answer

I don’t know what you mean by “integrating the authority”. The rest more-or-less makes sense but is not very grammatical, and quite wordy.

Integrating the authority is crucial to the delivery of efficient licensing services and the prevention of corruption. Therefore [not sure where the “therefore” comes from] we can use this technology for government procurement [of??]. What we need are time targets for this new project, covering the program proposal, internal and external discussion, and the determination [??] of the scope of the work.

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A few days ago
icegal007
No i don’t think it is correct.

I have tried to rephrase the paragraph again for you. See if it makes some sense to you now

Intergrating the authority is very important in order to deliver efficient licensing services , as well as to hamper corruption.

This technology can be used for Government Procurement.

In order to integrate the aythority we need to set a time target for new projects, along with the project proposals, internal and external discussion and preparation of the scope of work that is required for the project

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A few days ago
Val
well…there is more than one sentence there so i’m guessing you mean the whole paragragh. i sort of got the gist of it the third time i read it…it sounds like its a company memo or something – i think they’re designed to make you pay attention!
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A few days ago
tinkerbell
No, it doesn’t. I don’t think it’s even coherent. There’s quite a lot of things going on in one paragraph.
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A few days ago
TοRI
lol..
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