what are you talking about??

The first thing i would do is continue to not over-react about the issue. Instead, I would push it to a back burner for now and spend a good amount of time thinking about it. Sometimes things seem like a big deal and in the context of your values, they may very well be but, with time they sometimes simmer down to nothing. You’re doing the right thing by not overreacting, it shows a lot of strength of character on your part. I personally am a big fan of traditionalism however, I personally feel that much of it needs to adapt around today’s society. Although her changing her mind about changing her name may not be right, it is her right to change her name or not change her name. At the end of the day, when push comes to shove, nothing anyone says will ever be able to sway you to change your mind and honestly, that’s probably a good thing. But the question I would ask you is this: What’s more important to you, you spending your life with the woman who you love OR basing your marriage on her last name? Like it or not, that’s what this all boils down to. What you are going to do about this situation will speak volumes about the decisions you make in life. For instance, if your marriage really is contingent upon your wife’s last name, then why exactly did you marry her? If, on the other hand, you can accept that for whatever reason she chose not to change her name (and honestly, she doesnt even have to give you a reason) and accept that what really matters is the love that you share, then you’ll know that the bonds that tie the two of you together are far stronger than the bonds that most couples share. On at least some level, I can relate to you on this. If I were to get married, I would very much like it if my wife would take my name. But, I would never sacrifice love because of a value that does not involve health, prosperity or longevity. But then, that’s an example of me expressing my own values and everyone has different values. Once you’ve really let this stew for a bit and you feel that you can (maybe you already can) discuss it calmly and not get upset by anything she might say about it, I would suggest broaching the subject with her. And if this leads to a big fallout, for the love of God don’t just give up on your marriage. You say you love her but your values are very important to you. If this escalates and neither of you will budge, then go to a couples counseller – you know, those turkeys that serve an an unbiased intermediary between spouses on difficult issues. That might sound lame but, it often does work with resolving conflict in values and opinion. Whatever happens, I wish you the best of luck. And if you do involve an intermediary, she’s still your wife and stick up for her if something isnt fair even if the unfairness is working in your favor.

Hecht Brothers Department Store

Miller & Rhodes… I remember when they were bought out by Hecht’s and they closed the old store in downtown Richmond… Very sad day…

It wasn’t Legget’s, was it?