Hey Dude

Hey, Dude, don’t feel so sad

You drank Mad Dog; but don’t feel better

Remember, you let her into your heart

Now you’re apart. So much the better.

Hey, Dude, don’t be afraid

You were not made to go out and get her

The minute you start to go out with your kin

The DA begins, to write you a letter

And when it’s time that they arraign, hey Dude, refrain

Don’t carry that girl off on your shoulders

Hey don’t you know that it’s not cool, to stare and drool

I know, I saw, your rap sheet folder

Hey, Dude! You put that down

That gun is loaded, I’m just the messenger

Remember, you let her into your heart

You’re not so smart, don’t be a better.

So let it out and let it in, hey Dude, begin

You’re not to find cousins to perform with

And don’t you know that it’s just you, hey, Dude,

You knew, the law would come down on you like a boulder.

Hey, Dude, this ain’t Baghdad

This isn’t ping pong, time to do better

Remember, you let her into your heart

The rest of your life, you could be a debtor, debtor, debtor, debtor wooooooohh.

Naaah, nnaaah naaah nah nah naaaaa

Hey Dude!!

Fast Food Paradise

As I walk through the playplace with a burger in my hand

I take a bite and realize it’s very bland

But that is just great for a guy like me

‘Cause I eat every day at big Micky D’s

At 4:30 in the morning I’m in front of the door

Although the late night worker just finished moppin’ the floor. . . fool

I’m their top patron I’ve been comin’ so long

Even old Ronald thinks my mind has gone

I’m a man made of ham, I got so many chins

My legs are so chunky that I cannot see my shins

But if you finish your big mac, and I finish mine,

Then we can buy another 199

I’ve been livin’ most my life

Living in a fast food paradise

Eat a burger with some fries

Livin’ in a fast food paradise

Lots of soft drinks with some ice

Living in a fast food paradise

Bein’ fat is not a vice

Living in a fast food paradise

A guy from the green grocers scolded me last week

But I just smiled, and filled my other cheek

I don’t really mind that I don’t eat nothin’ green

‘Cause eatin’ too much salad makes you skinny and mean

But I ain’t never ate a salad; It would really be too much

Don’t see no greases drippin’? It got no Golden Touch

I like to eat my french fries from a massivley big vat

And to drown all of my burgers in a layer of fat, fool

I like my chicken nuggets, they are so very dear

A day without preservatives is my greatest fear

But I’m not a tater tot, so please give me more grease

I just wanna be really obese

There’s no fruit, no greens, no vegetables

Not a sinlge healthy thing

‘Supersize it’ is our motto

D’you hear fat sizzlin’?

I’ve been livin’ most my life

Living in a fast food paradise

Ten burgers will suffice

Living in a fast food paradise

Eatin’ junk food is so nice

Living in a fast food paradise

Devour burgers with two bites

Living in a fast food paradise

See those Golden Arches, mouth begins to water

Think of chicken nuggets, and of tater totters

You think you’re really bloated? You think your so obese?

Maybe after another eight hundred burgers with cheese

My belly pokes out from my pants and my belt is always tight

Me without a six-foot belly would just not look quite right

So don’t be skinny, and even worse don’t be crabby

Or I might just have to make your belly really flabby

I’ve been spendin’ most my life

Living in a fast food paradise

We should all be dead by rights

Living in a fast food paradise

The french fry lady is my wife

Living in a fast food paradise

Takin’ fatness to new heights

Living in a fast food paradise

Ooooooooooooooooooh… Burp