A few days ago
Rogue Scrapbooker

How can I get my son to embrace learning?

My son is 7 years old and gifted. He skipped 2nd grade this year. Unfortunately, he has no yearning to learn at all. He is lazy, will do only the bare minimum if that, will put off reading in favor of ANYTHING including just staring into space. It’s so frustrating! We’ve read to him since he was an infant. He claims to love space and spy stuff, but won’t even read books about that. It’s like pulling teeth! Tonight was a screaming match at homework time and I’m so tired of it.

Teachers, parents… anyone… how can I help my son to embrace learning before he becomes John Bender from the “Breakfast Club”?

Top 5 Answers
A few days ago
bigturkeyme

Favorite Answer

SPARE THE ROD SPOIL THE CHILD
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A few days ago
Iris the Librarian
I feel your pain. There are no easy answers. You might visit your library and research how parents can help their children in school. I will throw out some “is it possible?’ questions that run a gamut of behaviors. You will have to decide if any or all apply to your son.

It’s possible he’s being lazy and helpless because you come to his rescue. He may need to learn that there are consequences for not trying.

It’s possible he isn’t being challenged enough and is bored with even 2nd grade work.

Is there something going on at school that makes learning unpleasant for him? How many students are in his class? What is his relationship with his teacher?

He is smart enough to be in the 2nd grade. Is he mature enough to be there? Every year students advance in school they get less direction/ less direct attention from the teacher. They are expected to have the maturity to be self-directed. This break is especially evident in the 4th grade when students are expected to be a lot more independent. Is he ready for this?

You say he won’t read. Can he read? Could he have a vision problem (true dyslexia comes to mind) or poor reading skills? Many libraries have started Animal Assisted Reading programs where reluctant readers read aloud to dogs or other service animals. It’s a non-threatening environment. The animal doesn’t correct them or worry if they struggle. The animal only basks in their attention and gives them attention in return. The program has been very successful

Or it could be something else entirely.

You say he’s gifted. Many gifted boys suffer from some level of ADD. Have you considered having him tested for this?

My son was diagnosed ADD when he was in the 2nd grade. He wasn’t HDAD — there wasn’t a hyperactive bone in his body, but his mind was bouncing off the walls. His doctor explained that his brain was on fast forward and couldn’t slow down to grasp what the teachers were telling him.

He would stare out the window and become absorbed in a bug crossing the windowsill instead of comprehending the talk in the classroom. He couldn’t retain how to spell his spelling words from bedtime till morning. (He still has atrocious spelling.) ON the other hand, if the topic was something that interested him, he could spend hours on it. He would learn everything he possibly could about it. He would focus on his task so totally that I even wondered if he were deaf. He wouldn’t hear me call him to supper. As he grew older, he found he liked making things and fixing things. When other boys went out for baseball, he was helping his Dad rebuild engines.

He was on medication for a while that helped him learn to focus his attention. By the time he was in the 8th grade he was reading at a senior in college level. He was never class president or captain of the football team, but he found his niche in the theater department. Students and teachers alike thought very highly of him. His drama teacher cried when he graduated because he had become her right hand man, doing lights, and props and all the back stage work.

He became a diesel mechanic. He might be doing that still if he had not been nearly killed in a head-on car accident. This semester he is a junior in college. It isn’t easy for him, but he knows he has to stay on task and get the work done. For the most part, he’s making low As and high Bs. I will be very proud to see him get his diploma in two years. He’ll be 33 years old when he graduates.

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A few days ago
Dimmuchickx666x
If he likes spy stuff and hates reading, give him a magnifying glass to read with. make it fun. include what he likes into his learning and encourage him. Does he like stickers? If so it might be worth it to go out and get a wide variety of space and spy stickers and everytime he finishes his homework or whatever reward him with a sticker.
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A few days ago
Nikolas M
Get him some subscriptions to some kids’ magazines. They have pictures and short articles to match a kid’s attention span. Some kids get excited when you tell then they have mail. If he decides to toss the magaiznes then so be it. But even if he reads one article from each magazine it would be worth it right?
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A few days ago
Anonymous
Somehow learning has to be fun and you have to find the button.

Ask him.

If it’s too much like work it’ll be too much like work.

Ask him what he wants to do and how he wants to do it.

If he’s been told he’s ‘gifted’ too often he’ll think the universe owes him something and he won’t have to work for it.

Weird as it sounds, there’s almost as much wrong with telling a kid he’s smart as there is by telling him he’s dumb.

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