I prefer the second one, and let me tell you why: your first Paragraph contains redundancy “from all of this” AND “through all of this” and anyway, what is THIS? It’s too vague–through her experiences, maybe? Both paragraphs also contain a double negative: nothing will never be perfect. Should read: Nothing will EVER be perfect. Also at this point, (in the conclusion) you shouldn’t need to put who wrote the work, your reader should know. And is “we” really accepted by your teacher? How about “the reader” or instead, work around this pronoun by assumption: “It is evident” or “it is clear that…” And lastly, you need to decide whether you want to write this in the PRESENT or the past tense: overcomes/overcame. Choose a style and stick with it: most teachers prefer students to use the present tense. As far as interjecting your own personal experience, well, that’s your call, but it can definitely take the observation/review-like nature of your essay into a different genre–that of personal reflection/experience. I would recommend you think long and hard before you include your own experience here. And “In conclusion” is not a bad way to begin your conclusion–it’s a very good transition indicator to your reader what you’re doing, and most readers like to know where the writer is taking them.

In conclusion, it is evident that in “The Truth about Forever,” by Sarah Dessen, Macy overcame many obstacles during her summer vacation, including breaking up with her bofyriend, arguing with her mother, dealing with rude co-workers, and finding ways to overcome her father’s death. Through all of her struggles, Macy learned perfection is impossible, and that the past is behind her for a reason. Growing and evolving like any human, Macy’s lessons are ones that everybody can learn from, including myself.

The correct Collusion would be the first option because you do not the collision part of a essay or report in collusion,.