In the first letters you must provide your pen-pal with knowledge about you, and discover something about him. Go easy. Don´t put “everything” in the first letter. Concentrate on one or two of the following and keep others till later.

write about yourself. But don´t be too factual: “I am twelve years old and two months, weigh 6 stone 5 lbs, and am 4 feet 9 inches tall”. Don´t boast: “I would have come top of the class last month if…..” Say what your interests and hobbies are: what you do at school and how your day is arranged.

write about your family and home.

your home town; its virtues and its vices.

your country, if you know a lot about it.

Remember, however, that it is the vivid detail which is interesting. Write about things you know about, not things you´ve heard the geography master talk about.

Ask intelligent questions. Some exchanges of letter – and conversations too – get one-sided because one person asks all the questions. Make sure you ask one or two and reply to ones your friend asks, but don´t ask too many to start with. It is easy to ask questions. It takes a longer time to answer them. Too many questions is as bad as none at all.

When the penfriendship has got under way, writing becomes less hard work. Take a pride in what you write, however. Don´t write vaguely as many grown-ups do:” There were a lot of people there and we all had a nice time” is a typical example. The person who writes like that has not used his eyes and is not interested in his own letter. How many people were there really? Did everyone have a “nice time”? Why didn´t they? Can you remenber what the place looked like, the curtains, the furniture and above all the people? What in this would be interesting to your pen-friend anyway? These are some of the questions to ask yourself. If you are observant it is a great help.

If you are trying to describe something remember that the eyes are only one of the senses. Use your ears and nose as well.

From the above, a central principle; one interesting thing talked about in detail is much more interesting than a number of things talked about quickly and superficially. Only where you share a certain background is the latter recommended and even there the first is better.

Don´t forget the existence of lending libraries, reference libraries and reading rooms. Magazines, books and large scale maps can help you to see your pen-pal in his environment. Even if you are writing to a cousin of the same nationality in the next town you´d be surprised how much you can learn in this way.

The unusual is always a source of interest. Drawings, newspaper-cuttings, bus tickets, post cards, snap-shots and stamps are not difficult to slip in a letter. Magazines and papers are quite cheap to send by post.

If you can write amusingly it is a great help. Be careful, however; it is easy to misunderstand. And don´t write when you are miserable.

Finally, always say what you feel if you think you will not offend, but don´t pretend to things you don´t feel in order not to offend. Remember you are different from anybody else and so is your penfriend. Respect what you feel and respect what he feels too.